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Two weeks into my book launch, I had 9 signups.
I was looking for over 200.
In professional terms, that is what we call a “WTF!? moment.”
I want to be honest about what happened next, because it's not a heroic story. There was no dramatic moment where I rolled up my sleeves and got to work. What happened first was quieter than that.
A voice in my head started making a case. And it used a lot of “yes, but.”
Yes, but maybe the timing is off.
Yes, but maybe the audience isn't there yet.
Yes, but maybe this just isn't going to work.
It wasn't panic. It wasn't frustration. It was something more dangerous than either of those things. It was the slow, reasonable-sounding argument for giving up — dressed up as wisdom.
I've spent years helping leaders respond to these unexpected “Ding Moments” for both themselves and with their teams. And now I was in one, and not handling it the best…
This Is What Apathy Actually Sounds Like
Most people think apathy looks like checked-out employees, blank stares in meetings, people going through the motions. And it does look like that. Eventually.
But before it shows up on the outside, it shows up on the inside. As a quiet resignation. A reasonable-sounding case for why the thing probably won't work anyway. A slow withdrawal of energy from something that feels risky or uncertain.
It doesn't announce itself. That's what makes it so dangerous.
Resistance announces itself. Someone pushes back in a meeting, asks hard questions, says "I don't think this is going to work." You can see resistance. You can address it, work with it, even respect it.
Apathy is invisible until it's everywhere. And by the time you notice it on your team, it's usually been there for a while.
What’s funny is that when I tell readers this, they are initially surprised, then pause and think for a second, then realize that yes, this is happening. While they've been focusing on managing resistance — crafting the right messaging, anticipating objections, building the business case – the real obstacle has been quietly spreading through the bulk of their team: the good people with good hearts who are tired, overwhelmed, and have been asked to do more with less through too many changes to count.
They're not against the change. They've just stopped believing it's worth caring about. That's a very different problem. And it needs a very different response.
What Digging Deeper Actually Looked Like
Back to my book launch.
I sat with that quiet voice for a little while. And it honestly got louder. Telling me that it wasn’t going to work. That it wasn’t worth the effort. That maybe I was cursed (yeah, I never said the voice was rational…).
Then, after wallowing in that for longer than I care to admit, I did what I try to teach: I looked at what wasn't working before I decided the whole thing was a failure.
Turns out the emails weren't reaching people. A technical issue with the sending address meant a lot of my outreach was landing in spam or not landing at all. That was fixable. I fixed it.
But fixing the technical problem still wasn't enough. So I went manual.
I opened my contact list and started going person by person. Texting people. Calling people. Writing individual emails to anyone I genuinely believed would say yes if they actually got the message. It was slow. It didn't scale. It felt like the opposite of how a "proper" launch is supposed to work.
It worked.
By the time the advanced reader window closed, I was over 200.
Here's the thing I keep coming back to: the moment that mattered wasn't the pivot to manual outreach. It was the moment before that — when I recognized the voice for what it was and decided not to listen to it.
That's the real skill. Not hustle. Not strategy. The ability to catch apathy early, name it, and choose to go deeper instead.
This is why I say, “mindset before mechanics.”
What This Has to Do With Your Team
The YES AND Framework — the backbone of my book, Say "Yes, And!" to Change — is built on this exact idea.
When people are leading teams through change, they're usually fighting the wrong battle. They're preparing for resistance when what they're actually up against is apathy. And the tools for fighting resistance (clearer communication, better logic, a more detailed rollout plan) don't touch apathy. They might even make it worse, because they signal that the leader is more interested in the plan than in the people.
What moves apathy is something different. It's helping people find a genuine reason to engage — not with the change as an abstract initiative, but with what the change makes possible for them, their team, and the work they care about.
That shift — from going through the motions to actually buying in — is learnable. It's not about personality or natural enthusiasm. It's about creating the right conditions. I've watched it happen in rooms full of skeptical, exhausted people who walked out genuinely buzzing.
Let's Talk
The book lands in late April. But the change your team is navigating isn't waiting for a book launch.
If you're a leader right now who's trying to get your people genuinely on board — not just compliant, not just going through the motions, but actually excited about what's possible — I'd love to have a conversation.
Not a pitch. A real conversation about what you're navigating and whether the YES AND Framework is the right fit.
Reach out to me now and tell me what you're dealing with.
The change is coming whether your team is excited about it or not. The question is whether they're going to just survive it — or actually use it.
I help executives leading change turn apathetic teams into excited ones — through the YES AND Framework, experiential programs, and the improv-based principles in my upcoming book, Say "Yes, And!" to Change, launching late April.
When you are ready, here is how I can help:
- Keynote speaking at your conference, town hall, or annual meeting
- Training and consulting your leaders and staff to build a Yes, And culture
- One-on-one coaching to help you say “Yes, And” to yourself
Email me now if you’d like to chat…