Image Credit: IgorVetushko
I ran an improv group for over 7 years and I loved thinking of new games, techniques, and show formats.
Then I would burst into rehearsal bubbling with excitement about some new game or format I'd discovered. I'd share it with the group, expecting them to match my enthusiasm.
Sometimes they did. But often? They'd just say "okay" and go along with it. Not resistant, just... meh.
Here's what I learned the hard way:
We must not mistake our enthusiasm for our people's enthusiasm.
And here's what most leadership experts miss entirely: Apathy, not resistance, is the real killer of organizational change. They spend all their time talking about overcoming pushback when the bigger problem is teams that just...don't care.
Resistance has energy you can work with. Apathy? It's quicksand. The harder you push, the deeper you sink.
In this article, I'll show you what actually causes apathy (it's not what you think), why your logical approach backfires, and the exact shift that transforms disengaged teams into collaborative partners.
The Insidious Nature of Apathy (and Why it Drives Leaders Crazy)
Here's the most frustrating thing about apathy: There's nothing to argue against.
It's like debating someone you really want to have accept your point of view, and instead they simply say "okay, we'll agree to disagree" and walk away. You want to win the argument, but there's no punch for you to throw a counterpunch against.
With resistance, it's vocal. It's present. You can address the objections directly.
With apathy, your team members might just be doing their job. They're not doing anything wrong—they're just not engaged. Sound familiar?
This phenomenon flies under the radar because apathetic employees are technically compliant. They show up. They complete tasks. They nod in meetings. But they've stopped caring, and that's infinitely harder to address than outright opposition.
I once did a workshop for a room of attendees who clearly had no interest in their work beyond the paycheck. They had glazed-over expressions and zero interest in improvement. Apathy takes hold when people stop caring about improving at what they do.
(Note: I actually don’t have an issue with employees who do their job well and that is all. But if your goal as a leader is to move people from apathy and excitement, you need to be aware of what is happening.)
The Warning Signs You're Missing
Here's where it gets tricky: We think when our team says "yes" that's a good thing because they're agreeing and not being negative.
But there are two kinds of "yes."
Enthusiastic yes = engagement and energy
Complacent yes = apathy and shutdown
The warning sign of apathy isn't when your team says "yes, but;" it's when they shift from "yes, but" to just saying "yes."
"Yes, but" is resistance—but at least they're still engaged.
Just "yes" with no follow-up? That's apathy setting in.
“Yes, And”? That’s when they are adding ideas and taking initiative.
Pay attention to the emotion behind their "yes." If there's no energy, no questions, no input - that's your red flag.
Why Your Logic-First Approach Backfires
When I asked leaders what they do when faced with team apathy, they typically double down on explanation: more data, clearer presentations, better business cases.
Here's the fundamental problem with such an approach: We are not creatures of logic. We are creatures of emotion.
You can explain things as clearly as possible, but if you haven't addressed the underlying emotion, nobody's going to change. In fact, nobody's going to do anything.
I watched this play out at a large company workshop on new core values. A woman came up to me at the break and said, "This is good content, and I can see it applying to my personal life, but it's not going to make a difference here."
When I asked why, she said: "The problem is our leaders aren't doing this themselves."
Classic “Yes, But” trap: She appreciated the value, BUT her leadership wasn't modeling the behavior they wanted from her. So she became apathetic about positive changes because her leaders were pushing change without embodying it themselves.
Their logic was sound, but their conviction was missing. And apathy was the result.
The YES AND Fix: Why Involvement Crushes Apathy
Here's the contrarian truth most leadership experts miss:
Apathy isn't overcome by taking things off people's plates. It's overcome by adding the RIGHT things to their plates.
Not more work - more involvement. More autonomy. More ownership.
The YES AND approach works like this:
When you have a change initiative that your team doesn't want to embrace, you can keep pushing and explaining why it's necessary. Even if they comply, that inner resistance means they'll go through the motions and abandon it the moment they have the opportunity.
Instead: Start by understanding their current reality. Ask what's working for them now. Listen to their concerns. Then find ways to connect your initiative to what they already value: "I'm hearing that efficiency is really important to you, and this new process actually builds on that by streamlining the parts you mentioned are most frustrating."
It's about transferring enthusiasm not through logic, but through involvement.
Here's your script - except it's not really a script because I wouldn't say anything first. I would ask:
→ "How do you feel about the current situation?"
→ "What do you think is going on?"
→ "What do you think we should do?"
→ "How would your workday look tomorrow if you were able to do what you really wanted to do in the face of this change?"
Then listen. Actually listen.
Three Mistakes to Avoid When You Try This
Mistake #1: Starting with your biggest problem child
When we learn a new technique, we immediately want to use it with our most difficult employee. Don't. This takes nuance and practice. Start with lower-hanging fruit, as these are people who are more likely to engage and allow you to build experience.
Mistake #2: Saying "Yes, and" but meaning "Yes, but"
If someone suggests trying something new and you say "Yes, and here's why that won't work," you're still doing "Yes, but" even though you used the “right” words.
Mistake #3: Using "Yes, and" once and thinking you're done
You'll say "Yes, and" to their first response, but then when they dig deeper, the "Yes, buts" come flooding back. This is an iterative process, not a one-time fix.
The Bottom Line
Apathy is overcome when people get involved.
Not when you inspire them with your ideas, but when you ask them questions, listen to their answers, and inspire them with their own ideas.
Stop trying to change their minds and mentality. Start asking questions and giving them autonomy.
Your challenge this week: Pick one employee who seems disengaged (not your biggest challenge; start smaller). Ask them a question about the current situation and just listen. If they need encouragement, respond with "yes, and tell me more about that" to dig deeper.
Here's the question you're probably avoiding about your own leadership: Do you try to inspire your people with your own ideas, or do you ask them questions and listen to their answers and inspire them with their own ideas?
Because here's what I've learned: The leaders who create real change don't overcome apathy. They transform it into ownership.
Where have you seen apathy show up on your team? And more importantly, how did you respond? I'd love to hear your take in the comments.
Your team isn't broken. They're not lazy. They're just waiting for someone to ask what they think and actually care about the answer.
That someone is you.
Have a great weekend,
Avish
P.S. Are you interested in transforming your team or organization from apathy to excitement? Schedule a call with me now to talk about how one of my “Yes, And!” programs can help:
https://bookme.name/avishp/lite/keynote-discussion-with-avish-parashar